Jeeeez...

 

I did something so stupid. On a whim (this isn't the stupid bit) I applied for an events and marketing coordinator job in  Little Zoo in Eureka California.

And, to my surprise they got back to me and said they were very interested in interviewing me as I had some great qualifications. Here was an opportunity to work for a zoo! doing events and marketing -which I am as good at as any of my other dubious skills.

They asked me to fly to Eureka for an interview next week - what did I say....No...

I don't even know whats going on in my head - the cost was definitely a factor, flights were £1,500 and if I were to get the job I would have to forgo my holidays to Chicago and the Amazon. Would it all be worth it for a green card? I just don't know. I was scared I panicked and I turned down an amazing opportunity. Shit.

I feel like an idiot for turning down this opportunity but also very aware now that I need to really sit down and think about what I want. So far I have these ideas:

• I love my friends and family - Eureka is a 20 hour plane journey away - is that just too far for me?

(Washington, Boston, Miami are all nearer the 8 Hour mark - and flights are a more reasonable £600, although I'm also very aware that Eureka were interested in me BECAUSE its such a small town zoo - I have to start somewhere)

• Whats the alternative? Staying at the university - I admit I love it here - Its summer right now and the campus is a delight, and I'm enjoying the city as much as ever.
• Would I regret it if I ended up here? yes, I think I would, I would love to come back to Bath, and and safe in the knowledge I always could. But to find myself 40 and still working at the university? I think I would regret not tyring other things
• and perhaps most importantly: Animals! I totally lose sight of this plan to work with animals sometimes.
• I wasn't prepared to spend that kind of money and give up my holidays - as I know the opportunity, especially to go to the Amazon may never come up again. So I may have turned down one opportunity but I still have these (admittedly shorter term) things to look forward to.
• I was shaken because I've really hit my stride here in Bath -and although I like to dream of these big adventures in faraway places -I'm now more aware that perhaps, I'm happy here, should I just be content with that?

So in the the spirit of looking at the positives and not feeling like a complete idiot. Here is my action plan

• Apply for more events+marketing jobs, only the ones involved with animals - but think more about the area I'm going to, if I'd really be willing to live there.
• The Eureka job is open until filled - if it is still being advertised after my Amazon trip I will reapply
• Put some money aside for interviews in case I have to fly somewhere to do so.
• Basically stop f**king around, I've been here in Bath nearly 3 years now, and only had a handful of animal based jobs interviews.

So thats it, if you were offered a great opportunity so far from home, would you take it? should you take it?

I know what Mark Twain would say... I need to get out of my safe harbour, before I get stuck.

XXX